Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
