you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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