Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
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