There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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