Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
