sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
