I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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