Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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