Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Still dying that you shit outside
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
