Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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