Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
So vagazzling was a success
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
