I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize