quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Every concussion has its silver lining
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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