Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
