honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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