It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
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