tell your sister to shave her snatch
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
