...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
