Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
