Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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