your parents love me but you hate me
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Never underestimate the power of titties
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize