he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
