Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
