I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
