Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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