Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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