What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
