what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
she looked like the before picture.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize