Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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