Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize