I wannas sexs uuuuu
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
