we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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