I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
