Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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