brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
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