doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
