Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
