Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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