She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize