he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
