hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
