Rock
Scissors
Fuck
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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