yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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