Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
