Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
