so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize