I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
