I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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