I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
