i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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