they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Randomize
